


Tiger&Spider in Disney World

by thetimewalker2237



Category: Ultimate Spider-Man
Genre: Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-07-01
Updated: 2013-04-01
Packaged: 2013-06-25 04:47:13
Rating: M
Chapters: 9
Words: 15,787
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8274820/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/4001525/thetimewalker2237
Summary: Spiders! Tigers! Lemons! Aardvarks! Nova getting hit with a mallet! Its everything you every wanted in a fan fic! April Fools on Chapter 8! Chapter 9's got an nice apology lemon for you guys. Sorry bout Darkmoon!





	1. Tonight on: Spiderman

**Hello! This is the Time Walker here! Welcome back to Fan-fiction!**

The imaginary audience screamed in joy.

**We've got a special guest tonight. Put your hands together for the one, the only: The. Ultimate. Spiderman!**

"Thank you! Thank you! No photos please"

The imaginary paparazzi ignored him, taking several pics as the imaginary chibi fan-girls screamed and tried to tear off collectable chunks of his clothing from behind the velvet ropes.

"Ahh! Fan-girls!" Spiderman said as he jumped into the celeb chair. "So Timey, can I call you Timey, thank you for making this fan fic of me. I mean this is what, the 4th fanfic of me so far?"

**Number 7 at last check. You haven't really caught on here yet.**

"Aw, really? Hey any writers reading this please write about me, please! Somebody! Anybody?"

Cricket noises

"Oh, well. Let's change the subject. How do you come up with this stuff anyway?"

**Wait, shouldn't I be interviewing you? Well I don't really know how I get some of these crazy ideas. They just pop into my head and I write them down in this note book.**

"That's my cue!" Spiderman grabbed the notebook and sat down on the ceiling and started reading.

**Hey give me that back!**

"To slow! Warning: Spoiler Alert!" A spoiler alert sign appeared from his mind with flashing red letters. He flipped through the pages trying to get to the stuff about him. "There's like 10 pages of maps in here. And what language is this? Chinese?"

**Kanifan. I invented it. No give me my book back before you reveal anything—**

"He gona kill of Kid-Flash so Artemis and Ironman can get together!"

**...Important. :(**

"What else is therehere? Yuri and Alex get together in your Yugioh, big surprise! What's Secret Saturdays?"

**More people write about it than your show.**

"Low blow, man. Oh here's the stuff about me. What do you have me doing today? Disney? Sweet! And Sam disappears! Better!" In his mind, the chibi team appears in Disney World. Then Mickey Mouse kidnaps Sam, resulting in cheers from the rest of the team.

**It will make more sense than that!**

"Whatev'. What else is here? An OC in the story! Nobody likes OC in the stories! The girl design I get, but that would make too many tigers-girls. And what is with the guy? He looks like a ninja with a fedora and a cape?"

**Don't diss the fedora! And he looks a lot cooler then you put it!**

A chibi ninja appeared with an Indiana Jones-esque hat, a big red cape, and goofy orange sunglasses.

**That is not funny! He looks nothing like that!**

"Then don't put OCs in the story! What else is here?" shock moves over the eye things in his mask that somehow move with his eyelids but never blink. "WaitwaitwaitWAIT! Tiger/Spider! Please tell me that isn't what I think it is?"

**Yup. You and Ava get together with all the mushy emotions and stuff. I'm even contemplating putting a lemon in at towards the end.**

"Eww! Me and Ava!" His mind did wander to the lemon, but all you could see was a big censor bar, with a few limbs sticking out, still in costume. He glanced back down to the notebook, and his heart sank at the words. "You're planning to kill of Mary Jane! Why!"

**To get you and Ava together. Don't worry; she gets super powers before she dies. Wait a second; I just realized I'm writing this story so I can just say…**

Randomly, Spiderman fell off the ceiling, landing on his butt, the notebook falling into the Authors hands.

"That is totally, completely unfair!" He said as he rubbed his sore butt, "Seriously, you give MJ superpowers, and kill her off, just to get me and Ava together?" To demonstrate, chibi versions of MJ, Spiderman, and White-Tiger appeared. A chibi cupid poked a syringe labeled "radioactive" into MJ. She shined for a second, and then got a clichéd superhero outfit. The cupid then slit her throat, and coated two arrows with the blood and shoot Spider and Tiger in the butt. Hearts flew all around them and they started making out. "Couldn't she just hook up with Harry or someone?"

**Hmmm. That could work. Let's leave it up to the readers. Does MJ die a hero or get hitched? You decide! Should the OC stay or go? You decide! Should Tiger get pregnant? You decide!**

"What! That wasn't in the notebook!"

**Just came up with it. Well, that was an interesting interview. Let's all thank Spiderman for joining us today!**

The studio audience screamed in joy as the credits rolled by.

**(I tried to copy the comedy of the show. If it doesn't make sense, tell me via review. If it does, still review. I' like to see what the fans would like.) **


	2. A place you're not gona forget

**Well thanks to everyone for voting (and curing my writer's block). And here are the results:**

**6 said MJ should live, and 3 say die. She was going to be alive this chapter any way so I'll leave that poll open. And it's not gona be Harry.**

**4 people killed my OC. The caped ninja will rest in piece…s.**

**2 persons used protection and 1 didn't. (I'm talking about the pregnancy). **

**2 people gave me 1 word blurbs, 1 dissed my idea entirely and one I couldn't figure out what he was answering.**

**Anyway, I only needed to know about the OC for this chapter. The other two would happen latter, so you can keep voting on those. And now, the actual story:**

It was a quiet day in New York City. Well, quiet for New York. The rats were humping, the cabbies were cursing, and the peaceful sound of gunfire could be heard in the distance. The gunfire was coming from a police barricade, trying to keep a huge monster from ravaging the citizens. And no, the politicians were not in town today. It was Rhino, the quintessential B-grade villain writers can use to start a story with an action sequence that has nothing to do with the rest of the plot. He charged the police, and tried to head-butt (he he, I said Butt!) them. But a little web tripped him, and his horn stuck in the ground like a nail. Spider-man made a finger picture frame around his butt "You look better from this angle if you ask me."

"You're gona pay for that!" the beast retorted. He pried his head out of the ground, with a big chunk of pavement stuck to his horn.

"Nice hat!" that was Power-man. He flew, oops _fell_, into Rhino, grabbing the _hat,_ and flipped Rhino over like a flapjack. He slammed into a brick wall, leaving a Rhino shaped impression in the wall as he peeled himself off. Then Iron-Fist hit him in the jaw with his, um, iron fist. That knocked him into Nova's blast, which blasted him into a construction site. White-Tiger cut the crane line holding a large chunk of building materials, trapping the big lug.

"What do you know? We can actually make a good team," remarked Tiger.

"Why'd you say that!" Spiderman complained, "Now you've jinxed it"

Yes it did. Rhino broke free, whacking Power-man with an I-beam, making a nice bell-like tone. Tiger launched herself at him, but Rhino swatted her like a fly. If this was the show, they'd probably do a visual joke, turning Tiger into an anime fly or something, but this is a book.

Iron-Fist tried to punch him, but Rhino grab his arm, and using the powers of anime, bent him into a boomerang and through him into Nova. Spiderman leapt at him from the front and Tiger jumped him from behind. Rhino, um jumped onto his butt, breaking the ground, and fell into the sewer. Tiger and Spider collided head on, producing another ringing noise, before the fellow into the hole.

"Nice work, Spider!" Tiger complained.

"Me! That was your fault!" Argued Spider, then Spider did his freeze-frame testimonial thing, "First of all it's not a freeze-frame testimonial thingy. And second, how could you really think I could ever go out with that girl. And leaving MJ's fate up to the readers? Really"

That's why they killed of Robin. Fans got to choose. And you should probably get back to getting your butt kicked.

"Right. Back to Rhino." Un-pause.

"Who cares who messed up? We've got to stop Rhino." Said Spidey

"Wow, you can be mature," said Tiger, shocked.

"Who you calling mature?" Spidey retorted. Rhino was a short way down the tunnel. Spidey trapped him with a web line. "Ready for a rematch?"

"I gona pummel this guy," shouted Tiger as she jumped over Spidey. He then noticed the sent in the air.

"Who cut the Cheese?" then he noticed the broken piping, "Gas main! Tiger don't use the electro-claws!" Too late. The moment she turned the electrified claws on, the methane-ated tunnel blew. Rhino, with Spidey in tow, went flying through the air. The heli-carrier happened to be overhead, so they went straight through it. When Rhino went through Fury's office, he hardly cared. But when Spidey came through, he accidently knocked the colonel's coffee into his lap. "SPIDERMAN!"

Because this is a cartoon, an explosion that size only left scorch marks on Spidey, but knocked out Rhino, randomly. After dropping him off at the police (it took a lot of webbing to hang him in front of the station), the team had to face Fury's, well, fury. They reverted to chibi form as a giant-headed, chibi Fury yelled at them, steam billowing out his ears and fire on his breath, "Do you know how much this stuff costs! The desk alone will cost a fortune! You broke 3 buildings on the street and left a 40 foot crater on Broadway!"

Tiger piped up, "But that was Spiderman's fault."

"Thanks," replied chibi spider.

"This is all of your faults!" answered the fire-breathing Fury (that sounds like a kung-fu move), "You are a team! The blame goes to all of you! If one person messes up, it's everyone's responsibility to fix it.

Another testimonial, freeze-frame thingy. "This episode's moral lesson, right?"

Yup.

Back to the fire-breathing Fury (man that's fun to say), "I'm going to have to teach you all a lesson! I'm gona send you somewhere you'll never forget!" he unchibi-fied, "You're going to Disney World!"

While the rest of the team had unchibi-fied, Spidey's chibi had gone bug-eyed, "Disney? We're going to Disney world? We're going to Disney! We're going to Disney!" He was bouncing around with a Mickey Mouse ear hat, and other Disney memorabilia, "Hey, don't they own me now?"

"You're going there on a mission," Fury said.

"Oh," Spidey unchibi-fied finally.

The last unbroken screen in his office was used to show them their mission. "Teens have been disappearing in Disney's theme parks for over a month."

"Shouldn't we have heard about that?" Sam asked, "That kind of thing should have been on the news by this point?"

"Do you think Disney would allow anything like this to make the new, which they own, by the way," Fury explained. Makes sense to the team. "Since Disney owns Marvel, they wanted us to send some superheroes to deal with it. Since school ends tomorrow, you will be undercover. You'll pose as teens going on vacation."

"Which is exactly what we'll be doing," Danny pointed out.

"Wait a second," said Luke, "You said teens are disappearing. We're teens. Are you using us as bait?"

"That's why you'll have trackers on you at all times," answered Fury.

"Great! Human bait!" Peter complained, "But still, Disney!"

Poor animation of a clock and rotating night/day background are used to show time passing. The clock rings, and a rooster crows. The sleeping Spidey grabs the chicken and uses it to smash the alarm clock, then rolls over, producing more z-shaped snores.

"Last day of school! Yes!" Pete yelled in joy in the hallway.

"Hey Pete!" his favorite red-head called to him, "Guess what? Harry got the three of us a vacation package! World Tour on his yacht!"

"O. M. G!" Pete said in surprise and joy, "Why? When?"

"Cause he's our friend! And it's not like he doesn't have the money," remarked MJ, "We leave first thing tomorrow!"

Pete's emotions went from above the clouds to crapsicola (and yes I know that's not a real word).

"Crap! Me and the four other were going to Disney for the next few days," Pete explained, and his head dropped in sorrow, "Have fun on your world-wide cruise." Just then Harry walked up.

"Man you can make anything sound bad!" Harry joked, "I've got an idea! If you're going to Disney, why don't we just go, too? We can just cut out Santa Cruz."

Pete hugged Harry. "I love you, No homo! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" Pete nearly shouted.

Harry was shocked, "um, you're welcome?"

For once in Pete's life something had gone good to better.

"Hold on a sec there," Pete said as he freeze-framed, "Why the hell did you say that! In my stuff, that kind of thing means something _really_ bad is going to happen. Are going to kill MJ in Disney?"

It's where dreams come true.

"You're sick."

Yes. Yes, I am. But don't worry. The fans seem to want to keep her alive.

"Thank you fans!"

**Though now I've got a new idea. MJ gets pregnant! It's either her or Ava! I have to have a lemon somewhere. Maybe both? And Ava's kid would get superpowers no matter what. So new poll. Will Mary Jane get pregnant or die? Will Ava have a baby? Will I ever get my sanity back? Your voice (sorry, text), your vote. I just have 3 things to say before I sign off:**

**Yes, this is just an excuse to talk to myself, break the 4****th**** wall, and make lemons**

**By sheer coincidence, my Guinea Pig's name is MJ (short for Mo-Jo. Come to think of it, that's also the villain I plan to use in the next couple chapters. The Marvel one, you know the fat, cyborg people snatcher. Not the monkey from powder-puffs). Anyway, it seems creepy talking about killing MJ when there's an MJ in a cage in my bedroom. And that sounded even creepier!**

**FIRE BREATHING ****F****URRY!**

**That is all.**


	3. Tigers don't swim

**To the guy who suggested Mickey Mouse beating up Nova, I applaud your genius by giving all my readers the same imagery that my mind came up with: Mickey Mouse hitting chibi Nova over the head with a giant mallet Mario-style. Once again, thank you.**

**And to all the people who said that it should be Ava and Danny, 'because that's what would happen in the show: This is Fan Fiction people! There are far stranger things on here. So shut up about it!**

**Now an interesting question. All the other matching's on fan fiction have some abbreviation/contraction, like Taang, Anisoka, or Pepperony (now I laugh whenever I order pizza). So what should this be? Ava plus Peter? Avter? Peva? Or Tiger plus Spider? Tider? Spiger? I think Spiger is the best of them.**

**Now to the story. As fun as it would be to have them drive down, and writing a long conversation consisting of "Are we there yet?" and "NO!", I think they are going to take the yacht.**

"Now this is how to travel" MJ remarked, sea wind blowing through her red hair.

"My jet would have been faster," Harry commented, "but this seems better, just for the look on everyone's faces."

He was not referring to MJ delight, but the funny faces the team was making. Peter had his head over the railings, like a dog in a car, tongue flapping in the breeze.

"Hey," Pete complained,"you think I'm stupid, look at Sam!"

Cut to Sam on the bow of the ship, quoting Titanic, "I'm king of the worl-" He was cut off by a large wave that splashed him, leaving an octopus on his head.

"From bucket-head to octo-head!" Pete laughed. Sam grabbed the octopus, ripped it of his head, and stuck it over Pete's mouth, which brought laughter to the other passengers. Pete struggled to rip the octopus of his face by pulling on it like a plunger in a repeated, cartoony fashion, which only resulted in more laughs.

"Mmm mrr, my murph mmr mire," Peter retorted from behind the octopus. He finally ripped the octopus off his face.

"Hmm, calamari anyone?" he said jokingly. Ava barfed on him. The spaghetti she had eaten looked like an octopus on his shirt. "Eww!"

"I'm so sorry!" Ava tried to explain, "It's just that I get sea sic- blaah!" she barfed again, this time, thankfully, over the railing.

"Ick!" complained Peter, "guess I won't be wearing this shirt again!" he through the vomit soaked shirt off the side of the boat. He felt like the girls should be staring at his toned abs and pecs, but it's hard to be attractive when you're standing next to a barfing girl.

Freeze-frame, "hey, Author-guy! You think you could end this weird scene now?" Pete asked.

How's about a big storm and really ominous music.

"Yeah that sounds go- Wait! What? No!"

Too late. Un-pause. A freak storm rolled in, making the seas much rougher, producing more vomit from Ava. Just for the ambiance, how about the theme from Jaws? And a large dorsal fin sticking out of the water? That should set the tone just fine. Oo, and lightning! Yeah, lightning all around the boat. One flashed really close to the boat.

"Geez," Pete said, "Is the thunder god after us or something?" trying to make light of the situation.

Cut to Thor, playing darts with lightning bolts. His trying to hit a cardboard cut-out of the yacht, but keeps missing, and is getting frustrated. "Curse this mortal game of darts!" He the throws the entire box of lightning darts at the ship at once, none of them hitting. "AAARRRGGGHHH!"

Cut back to the boat.

"We need to get inside! Now!" Harry called to the group. They all ran towards the door except Ava, who was still leaning over the railing.

"Ava, come on!" Pete called.

"I'll be right ther-" she said but was cut off by another up-chuck. Just then, for plot-line's sake, a large wave hit the boat, knocking Ava off the boat into the water. "Help! I can't swim! Hel-" she screamed as she struggled to stay afloat, but she still sank beneath the waves. I know, making the cat-themed character unable to swim is stereotyping, but oh well.

Pete ran and jumped of the side of the boat without thinking. But as he was mid-air he saw the large dorsal fin of a shark conveniently headed straight for Ava. "Crap!"

No to cut off were the tensions are highest, let's look at what's going on inside. Danny was trying to teach Luke how to control his fears. He had aquaphobia, which is not really something you want on a boat in the middle of the ocean. Since he got on the boat, he had been wearing a life vest, water-wings, and an inflatable ducky inner-tube to insure he wouldn't sink.

"You must face your fears of the water," Danny said, "look out into the water, tell me what you see." They were under the water line, and you know nothing makes a water-phobe feel safer than when he is submerged under water.

"All right!" Luke said, bucking up to the challenge, his knees still shaking along with the rocking boat. He looked out the window in time to see Ava drift into view. Pete swam down and grabbed her just as a great white shark came into view. Pete shot a web blast into the beast's mouth. It was stunned for a second, then it made gagging noises at tried to wipe the gross stuff off its tongue with its fins in a cartoony fashion. As it moved after the heroes, Namor the Sub-mariner came into view and whistled. The shark turned around and started to pant like a dog at hearing its master. Namor took out a whale bone and through it, and had a nice game of fetch with the shark.

"What do you see?" Danny asked Luke.

"I see that the author is having trouble coming up with good material," he replied.

Because of that we go back to the deck. Pete got Ava onto the deck. She wasn't breathing. He started performing CPR. Normal he'd make a quip about touching her boobs, but her life's on the line, so he'll just save that for latter.

As he placed his lips on hers to breathe new life into her, she started to cough up sea water… right into Pete's mouth, and out his nose! I know it's dumb, but I need more comedy, so I have to force it in. Hehe, force it in, hehe!

Now that the life threatening situation is over, the storm goes away replaced by a nice, hand-drawn sun, complete with smiley face.

"Pete," Ava said weakly, still gasping some, "You, you saved my life. Thank you." She hugged him weakly.

"Don't mention it," Pete said, "let's get you somewhere warm." He picked her up, bridal style and brought her inside and laid her in a bed. The other hadn't seen what had happened, so when they walked in soaking wet, Ava in Pete arms, Sam's imagination put two and two together and got 3.

"Peter and Ava, swimming in the sea, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" He mocked with the old children's rhyme.

"Dude, she fell in, idiot!" Pete yelled, not in a joking mood (now that's a rare sight!), "I jumped in and saved her!"

They all walked over to see their friend. She was resting and still soaking wet.

"We'd better get her into something dry before she gets hypothermia," MJ noted. The boys were still all staring at Ava. "That means boys leave! Now!"

Disappoint face. They turned and left the room, which revealed that the octopus from before was stuck on Pete's back.

"You should probably get changed too, Pete," Harry said.

"Probably," Pete replied. He scratched his back, the octopus moved out the way of his hand. (This would be much funnier on TV, wouldn't it?)

_Some kind of time-lapse device of some sort:_

They were eating dinner, which happened to be calamari, when Pete decided to check on Ava. She was just waking up when he got down.

"How you doing?" he asked.

"Better now, thanks," she said, "And, Pete, thanks for, well, saving my life and all."

"It was nothing," he postured, "Just another day for your friendly, neighborhood Spiderman."

She laughed, "But I still feel like I need to thank you, though." Her near-death experience had changed her feelings towards the spider, plus hormones were playing a role. She adjusted the robe she was wearing to reveal a little more cleavage.

We are interrupted by the image of a chibi Spiderman at a lemonade stand hollering, "Lemons! Get your Lemons here! Round, Plumb, Juicy Lemons!" And now back to your regularly schedualed program.

She leaned into Pete and kissed him.

"Wha, wha, wha," Pete stammered, but Ava put a finger to his lips to silence him, then kissed him again.

Before things could heat up more, they were interrupted by a voice from the stairs, "This is gona be good!"

They both turned and stared at Sam, then in unison shouted, "Get out!"

"Sheesh, you love birds!" he said and left.

"Well that ruined my mood," Ava said and left to get dressed, then added, "That was all you were gona get anyway, Pete."

Pete just sat there, stunned. Then freeze-frame.

"What was with that big tease!"

Did you think that it was gona be that easy for you. I mean, you haven't even got to Disney yet. If you want some of that super-heroine ass, you gona have to work for it.

"Do you know how weird that sounded?"

Yeah, it did sound weird.

"You've been pretty off today."

Everyone has bad days. I'm trying my best. At least the 4th wall was broken.

"Yeah but that doesn't make a fan-fic. And when am I finally gona get some action here?"

**Be patient. The lemon will come, trust me. But not yet. Sure if the humor was sub-par. I even forgot what the polls were about, but they are still open, so vote. Or say anything. All reviews welcome, except if your just dissing me. If so, just shut it.**


	4. the trained aardvark

**Thanks to everyone that reviewed. You kept me working on this. For Amazing girl, a lemon is, well, um, a story with, uh, mature content, if you get my drift. If that isn't what it is, someone please complain now.**

**I'll be putting in some fan service in the this story so if you have any suggestions, I'll try to use them (I love all the suggestion of how to beat up Nova using Disney characters) **

**But now, an important piece of information that you must understand before reading further. DO NOT SKIP OVER THIS!:**

**Deir sé seo i ndáiríre rud ar bith. Chlóscríobh mé díreach tar éis suas rud randamach agus é a chur i aistritheoir. Ba chóir é seo a bheith go maith ar feadh cúpla gáirí, nó díreach an ifreann annoy as duit.**

And now the story. After landing the yacht, they all crammed into a car to drive to Disney. For the comedy of it, imagine a little card board VW rental moving across a road map of Florida.

"Take a left here!"

"I know how to get there!"

"The other left!"

"There's only one left!"

"Are we there yet?"

"No!"

"Right up ahead!"

"That'd put us in the ocean!"

"Are we there yet?"

"No!"

They passed a sign that read "welcome to Key West"

"How'd we get to Key West?"

"I don't know!"

"Dude, the maps upside-down!"

"Oops"

"Give me that!"

"Are we there yet?"

"NO!"

"Take a left!"

"That's what he said last time!"

The sign read "Welcome to Hawaii!"

"How is that possible?"

"Are we there yet?"

"NO!"

"Give me the map! Take a left here"

"Another left?"

"Are we there yet?"

"NO! Wait, actually, yes!"

They finally saw the sign that read "Disney" in that weird cursive that makes the D look like a backwards G. First stop: Animal Kingdom!

(Fan service time)

While most of the group was being distracted by a trained aardvark, Sam walked up to a guy in a Donald Duck costume.

"What are you anyway? A goose or something?" At that Donald kicked him in the nuts. The guys in animal costumes are all either jerks or pedophiles. True story time: A guy in a Mickey Mouse costume came to his son's class in the elementary school in my town. By the time the principle had been alerted that a guy in a Mickey Mouse costume had gotten into the school, he had taken the costume off, so he was locked up in a closet with the kids during the lock down. It took them 2 hours to figure out they locked the potential pedophile in with 20 7-year-old kids. Anyway…

"Your gona pay for that!" Sam screamed. They got into a fist fight, which drew a lot of attention (and a circle of people chanting "Fight! Fight! Fight!"). Finally a Mickey Mouse came over and hit him over the head with a mallet, knocking him out.

His friends finally came to his side as he was coming to.

"Lollipops!" he screamed, in compliance with the fan request, "the lollipops are everywhere!"

"I think he needs to go to the hospital," Danny pointed out what everyone was thinking.

"The lollipops! They're gona get us! Run for it!" Sam screamed from his stretcher.

"Am I the only one who is really enjoying this?" Pete asked to himself out loud, which got him a punch in the shoulder from Ava. "It was a joke! Honest!"

"Sure," Ava said skeptically, "let's just get back to our vacation."

"To the rides!" He grabbed Ava by the arm and ran at cartoon speeds towards the coasters and cruises.

"They make a cute couple, don't they?" Harry asked. Danny and MJ stared at the happy couple, who were once again distracted by the trained aardvark, with envy. A can't really write that emotion to well, so I'll just tell you strait out. They eventually were able to pull themselves away from the trained aardvark (the juggling part got boring after the chainsaws), and went to the rides.

First up: Kali River Rapids. Pete was the first to sit down, and soaked his paints to his butt. MJ cut in front of Ava to sit next to Pete, leaving Ava to sit next to Danny.

"Did you to plan that?" Pete asked MJ as the boat started the journey.

"Plan what?" MJ replied innocently. The ride went smoothly from there, until the water fall.

Cut-scene gag: "Chibi-Spiderman now proudly presents everyone's favorite game show: Wheel. Of. Water!" the raft turns into a roullete wheel with everyone's faces on it. "Now who is going to get soaked today? Could it be Pete and MJ? Maybe Ava and Danny. Could it be Luke and Harry. Or will it be the random Japanese couple that sat with us. Let's spin and find out!" the wheel spun and spun until it landed on Danny and Ava. "It looks like we have a winner!" the study then flooded with water as we cut back to the real world. As they get off the boat, Danny and Ava are soaked to the bone.

Pete quickly bought a towel for Ava and put it on her shoulders. "You just love the water, don't you?" Pete asked jokingly. She responded by shaking her head like a wet dog, whipping Pete with her wet hair. They couldn't help but laugh.

Everyone could see the obvious flirting, except the two of them, of course. MJ was definately jealous, and came up with a plan. She bought a towel and helped Danny dry off.

"Thank you," Danny said, "I know what you're doing, it won't work."

"What are you talking about?" MJ asked nervously.

"You won't make him jealous," Danny said with his zen-ness apparent, "Pete is blind when it comes to this stuff." Chibi-spidey takes offense to that statement.

"Yeah you're right," MJ realized. Chibi-spidey takes more offense. "What about Ava? If we get her jealous, she'll go to you and Pete might come to me as a rebound."

"That sounds like a plan!" Danny responded. (I told you it wasn't gona be Harry!)

Luke and Harry were currently placing bets on which couple would get in bed together first. Luke put 50 bucks on Avter. They looked up and saw the word "God" written on the sky.

Freeze-frame. "What? That's uber-random!"

That actually happened to me. When I walked out of the Rapids, I looked up and saw the word god written in the clouds.

"Weird."

We kept watching, and saw the plane sky-write "loves you" after "god."

"Aw, sweet." Un-pause.

They day went on like that. Ever flirt Ava or Pete made was copied by MJ and Danny. Pete won a giant chicken at the midway and gave it to Ava (and yes there is a midway there), so Danny had to copy him and try to get another large, flightless food bird for MJ, but kept losing. He eventually got a consolation prize of a miniature chicken. Pete gloated in Pete's way for the rest of the day. I'll through in a few more gags just to reach the comedy quota for today. When they were on Expedition Everest, Pete said Hi to Sam as he passed the yeti. And when they walked out of Dinosaurs, Pete said it wasn't scary. Luke went behind him, and said boo. Pete jumped into Ava's arms like Scooby Doo.

**And besides maybe another reference to the trained aardvark, I can't think of anything else. So I hope this random image will be good enough to end on:**

**Chibi Spiderman dancing the Hamster Dance. **

**And with that I take my leave. Sorry no lemons yet. **

**Lemon gives a disappointed sigh and waddles away. **

**Aw come back here! I just got one more chapter to go through till I make the lemon! Come on!**

**I got to chase the lemon now. Please review! Aw, come on, I'm sorry!**


	5. the giant golfball

**A chibi Spidey in revolutionary get-up on galloping horse is yelling, "The Lemon is coming! The Lemon is coming! It's only one chapter away!" And yes idiots I will make the rating M when I add the lemon. Sheesh.**

**Ok your votes have been totaled and MJ lives. *applause* It seems like most of you forgot to buy protection, so there will be baby Spigers or whatever. Unless you all complain before I get to that part. I'd still probably write it though, but then just to annoy the ones who hated the idea.**

**And Nova will never recover from the horror of the lollipops. Until Mojo brain-naps him. Oops! Spoilers!**

**Anyway, everyone get around the campfire if you want to hear the story (but do not set computer on fire):**

Pete was sitting on a throne in a roman get-up. He watched Ava dance as MJ feed him grapes.

"This is the life!" he said, "Thanks Author-guy!"

It is a nice dream, but you're gona wake up in 3 secs.

"Aw crap!"

RRRIIIIINNNNGGGGG!

"Stupid alarm clock!" Pete mumbled as he woke up on the floor. Harry got the bed last night. Ava and MJ shared the room next to them and Luke, Sam, and Danny bunked together in the room after that.

"Dude, who brings an alarm clock on vacation?" Pete mumbled as he tried to go back to sleep.

"The hotel has free breakfast from 6-7," Harry answered, "If you want free food, you'd better get up!"

And "food" was the magic word. Pete was ready in two minutes and raced Harry down the stairs to the breakfast buffet, losing because he forgot to tie his shoe and landed hard on his butt. He managed to get in line just before Ava.

"Morning, Pete," she greeted him. He returned her greeting with a yawn, which was returned, in turn, by a slap.

When they got up to the omelet station, the Hispanic chef looked at the couple. "So when's the wedding?" They both simultaneous tried to explain they weren't a couple, in that funny way you've seen on TV but is impossible to write. After much debating the chef just kept smiling at them.

"Oh just give me an omelet," Pete admitted in defeat. (This exact scenario actually did happen to me in Disney. And the chef would not stop calling me Paul.)

With that awkward situation over, the group headed to the next park: Epcot.

"What does Epcot stand for anyway?" Ava asked in the car.

"Extra Planetary Convention Of Trekkies?" Pete guessed. Chibi Spock gives a "long live and prosper" hand gesture.

"How about 'Eccentric Pete Can Over Talk'?" suggested Luke. Everyone laughed except for Pete, who just mumbled to himself and moped.

They caught sight of the giant golf ball as they approached the park. The first thing they did was go in said giant golf ball. Its history lesson was made much nicer by Pete's constant joking. But the joke was on him, when the little picture thingamajig put his head on the picture of the housewife while Ava's was put on the man in the suit.

"Looks accurate to me," Sam said which got a laugh from everyone but Pete. Danny and MJ were still trying to make the other couple jealous, and their picture was quite cute.

Sam of coarse wasn't there yesterday, so he freaked when he saw those two together. "Danny! And MJ! When the hell did that happen?"

Danny and MJ just blushed, while Pete and Ava stared at them. Luke and Harry tried and failed to keep themselves from laughing.

"Well, uh," Pete mumbled, and then his brain actually kicked in, "I never noticed before, but you two make a great pair."

"You go great together," Ava concurred. Danny and MJ just starred at them. Plan fail. Harry and Luke couldn't breathe they were laughing so hard.

Sam counted on his fingers, "So now we have two couples: Avter and what would this one be? Dary Jane?"

Both couples yelled at him in unison, "We aren't a couple!" Harry and Luke were rolling on the floor.

After that they explored a little and discovered a shop that sold watermelon flavored soda (or pop, or coke, or carbonated beverage or whatever you like). Sam and Pete had a drinking contest which made the bloat like ticks. Imagine two 10-foot wide spheres with their heads glued on top rolling around the shop. They both burped for about 10 minutes, deflating themselves. Sam sniffed the air "Mm, watermelon!"

With that disturbing image, they split up. Pete and Ava went to try to go to Soarin' (trademark), but the wait was 3 hours (I'm not kidding). They looked around the building and found another ride, the boat that goes through the place with the square fruit and alligator tanks. Closest thing to the tunnel of love I could think of.

"Pete," Ava said shyly, "You know how we've been spending a lot of time together lately?"

Pete wasn't listening. He was webbing a large piece of fruit on display and reeling it in. "Jack fruit?"

"Pete! Put that Back!" she yelled.

"Sorry" he put it back with a flick of the web.

"I'm trying to tell you something real serious here and you're stealing fruit!" she yelled losing her temper.

"All right," he said, afraid of angry Ava, "Sorry! What were you saying?"

"Ok," she said calming herself, "You know how we've been hanging together a lot lately?"

"That's what friends do a vacation," he said.

"And how you saved my life?"

"Kinda my job."

"And the kiss?"

"That was definitely the best reward I ever got for saving someone," He said, remembering the great feeling of the kiss, "What of it?"

"Man you are blind!" She said, annoyed, "You really haven't figured out yet have you?"

"Figured what out?" he said, genuinely having no clue what she was talking about.

"I think I l-" she said the last part so quietly he couldn't hear her.

"You think you what?" Pete asked

"I think I lo-" she said still too quiet.

"What!"

"I think I love you!" she said it very quickly to get it over with.

Pete was frozen in shock. Chibi Spidey came out and slapped him in the face and splashed him with water. "Come on, Man. Says something to her. This is your chance to score!"

"Ava, I, I, I love you too," He was finally able to mumble out. She hugged him and they kissed as the ride ended.

"Hey love birds," the man operating the ride said, "Get of the boat!"

Meanwhile:

Danny got MJ some ice cream after they rode the spaceship ride that I can't remember what it's called.

"You don't have to be nice to me anymore," she said, "they're not here so the ruse won't do anything."

"Why is that any reason not to be nice to a pretty girl?" he asked suavely.

"You're so nice," She said

"MJ it's really nice hanging with you," Danny said, trying to get out what he had to say.

"It's fun being with you," She said. I just realized I wrote these conversations as he said/she said.

"MJ I, I…" Danny had some trouble getting it out.

"What?" MJ asked. Then she looked down at her watch, "Crap! We were supposed to meet up with the other 10 minutes ago!" She grabbed Danny and ran across the park, legs turning into poorly drawn carton spirals.

Sam, Luke, and Harry had already met up in front of the American spot on the lake.

"Where are they?" Luke asked just as a blur came in, that turned out to be MJ and Danny, huffing hard from running.

"We late?" Danny asked.

"You beat Ava and Pete, so you're not that late," Harry said annoyed. So I have less to write, they showed up just then. They both had sombreros and Mexican ponchos, and Pete was munching on a churro.

"We were, um, distracted," Ava explained. Flashback to the Mariachi band that Pete tried to join. I'll let you imagine that yourself.

They kissed and MJ snapped. (Someone asked for a catfight so they're gona get it! Though now MJ seems a little unstable). She tackled Ava, knocking both of them into the mud and they tussled.

The little Spidey angel and the little Spidey demon popped up on Pete's shoulders.

Angel: "You have to stop this senseless fighting before your friends hurt each other!"

Demon: "and Miss this! We ought to sell tickets!"

Pete for once listened to the angel, flicking the demon into the lake. He got in between them and stopped them. Each one had a large chunk of the other's hair in their hands.

"What the hell was that about!" Ava yelled at MJ.

"I just couldn't take it!" she yelled back, being held back from attacking again by Danny, "I could bear seeing Pete with another girl!"

Pete was shocked for a second, but finally figured out the best thing to do for everyone. He was going to have to be, *gulp*, mature about this.

"MJ, I'm sorry," He tried to say gently, "Me and Ava are in love. I'm sorry if I've hurt you."

She stared at him for a moment, then broke down into tears. Danny held her as she wept into his shoulder. She cried for a minute, and then apologized for soaking Danny's shirt.

"Don't apologize," Danny said comfortingly, "But there is something I have to tell you, but I don't think this the best time."

"What?"

"I think I may have fallen in love with you," He said nervously.

"You're just saying that,' she said turning from him.

But he grabbed her and turned her back to him. "No I'm not. You are sweet, nice, intelligent, beautiful, (a long list of compliment). Of the past couple days I've really fallen for you. Being with you is best thing I've felt in forever. I love you." With that they kissed, as the fireworks started.

Sam's eyes were comically large and watery. "That was just… beautiful!" As he wiped a tear from his eye.

Seeing the other couple kissing, Pete pulled Ava close to him, embraced, and kissed. It was the best sensation he had ever had. He only wished he could be even closer to her…

**How sweet! More romance than comedy this chapter.**

**The Lemon is up next! *standing ovation with high pitched whistles.* So fair warning to anyone who does like lemons. I am going to be pretty graphic. And of course I'm gona raise the rating. You think I want to get reported?**

**Anyway, would did you think? Anything and everything excepted in reviews. **


	6. the LEMON!

**The Lemon is here! HURAY! And look! Rated M, see? What first? Lemonade? Lemon drops? Lemon meringue pie? Please tell me you get the joke on the last one. **

**Cookie-cutter FCC warning: **

**WARNING: this contains material of a graphic sexual nature. Parental discretion advised. Not legal to be viewed by those under the age of 18 or residents of the state of Massachusetts (sorry Mass.)**

**Yeah, no one listens to those warnings ever. Thought it would be funnier than it is. But this is going to be pretty graphic, so if you don't like this shit just don't read it, ok. I don't want some random moralist telling me I'm going to hell because of this. And in reading through some lemons here, they don't like to use the slang terms. Are they allowed here or not, because I'm gona use some bad words ****a lot.**** If they are, tell me quickly and I'll change it before I get kicked out.**

**Now that I've established this is written porn, I'm going to tell you about the best lemon I ever read before I write my own. So this college guy lives at home with his two sisters (you can see where this is going from here). He gets drunk a lot and passes out when he gets home. He wakes up and his dick hurts. The next night he didn't drink as much and is only half asleep. Turns out, his big sis was teaching his little sis how to give a guy a blowjob using their drunken brother. Best lemon ever!**

**Wow I'm long-winded today. Well without further ado, here's your lemon: **

***picks lemon slice out of ice tea***

**Here you go. Just joking. I have to have some jokes in here. Anyway, here you go:**

The two couples had decided to make their first date a double date, while the other three are sent somewhere off screen so they don't interfere with the lemony goodness.

Once dessert came around, hormones started kicking on. Ava had a bit of ice cream on her lip, so Pete decided to clean it off with his own lips. Make-out session begin! Their lips parted and their tongues twisted around each other's, exploring the other mouth and tasting the remnants of their dinner. And sushi doesn't taste that good on someone else's tongue.

With all that going on across the table, MJ and Danny had to make-out. Of course, that got them thrown out of the restaurant, but who cares. They went back to the hotel and got ready for bed in their own rooms. Just as he jumped into bed, he heard a knock on the door connecting his room to the girls'.

"Pete could you come in here for a minute?" Ava asked from behind the door.

Pete grumbled about how he was nearly asleep to himself but got up and opened the door. His jaw literally fell to the floor when he saw the sight before him. All Ava had on was skimpy black lingerie. Pete stared at her gazing lovingly at every perfect curve of her body.

But when she saw him, she giggled. "Polar bear PJs?" He was wearing blue pajamas with polar bears on them.

"I didn't know we were dressing up tonight!" He said as his face grew red.

"Don't worry," she said as she pulled Pete into her embrace, then whispered into his ear, "You won't be wearing them much longer." With that, a lower body part rose to the occasion. She reached down to feel it, and was surprised by the large size. I'll be generous to Pete and give him a ten-incher for this lemon.

Freeze frame. "!" Now back to the porn.

They locked lips and kissed as they removed each other's clothing. As they fell onto the bed, Pete's shirt landed on a lamp and Ava's top hung from the TV. Pete felt Ava's bare breasts against his chest. He slowly kissed his way down her neck to her chest, and sucked her left nipple into his mouth, as his hand played with the other, resulting in moans from Ava. After switching breasts and sucking for a bit longer, Ava pushed Pete of her, resting herself on her elbows.

"Your turn," She said, as she pulled his pants down, revealing his stiff member. She kissed the tip, sending waves of pleasure over Pete's body. She started to lick it, kind of like a Popsicle, each lick feeling better than the last. She eventually wrapped her lips around the tip and began to bob her head. She started off slowly but increased her pace. Pete grabbed the back of her head and guided her movements, pushing his dick deep into her mouth causing her to gag. She had to pull out to breathe.

She moved into a different position, on her back, facing Pete. She reached one hand down inside her panties and began messaging her womanhood.

"Come on," she teased, "You know you want to taste it." He did. She allowed him to remove her panties revealing swollen lower lips. Her parted the lips with his hands and moved to lick her. The taste was, _interesting._ He traced slow circles around her stump, producing more moans. He let his thumb take over so his tongue could explore. He could not find any opening to the inside.

"Are you a virgin?" he asked, juices dripping down his chin.

"You are my first," she admitted.

"This is my first too," he said. He kept up with the oral, until she started to scream; he licked faster and faster, and was then soaked in her juices as she orgasmed. They kissed and she licked her juices of his face. Then Pete repositioned himself for the real deal.

"You ready? This is gona hurt some," Pete asked for permission.

"Just fuck me already!" Ava yelled impatiently.

Pete placed his tip between her lips and thrusted slowly. Her hymen didn't break, so he thrusted again, harder, breaking both their virginities. Ava winced from the pain, but Pete, Pete was in heaven. Her walls enveloping his dick were the best sensation he had ever felt. In fact, it was too good. He ejected as soon as he entered her.

Chibi-Spidey: "Remember kids: Always use protection!"

She seemed not to notice because of the pain, so Pete just continued to pump. She wrapped her legs around his waist and drew him further into her with every thrust. His pace picked up, and he pushed faster, deeper. He leaned down to meet Ava's face and they kissed. Then Ava grabbed his shoulders and pushed him over, rolling on top of him, his dick inside the whole time.

"My turn on top," She said as she began to bounce up and down on his shaft. Pete sucked on her tits, as she pounded him fast and fast. Soon he felt pulsations coming from both genitals as they both reached climax together.

"I'm cumming!" Ava screamed, as she arched her back.

Pete was too overpowered by the sensations to say anything more than, "Urgh!"

They climaxed. Her walls clenched his member as tight as possible as the warm juices mixed inside her. Pete pulled her off and placed her on all fours. He still had one go left. He pounded her doggy-style and made her cum again. As he felt his own orgasm approaching, he pulled out. He grabbed Ava by the hair, pulling her to her knees. He thrust his dick into her mouth and came for the 3rd and last time. She swallowed it all before she released his cock.

They lay down on the bed as their breath slowed and they recovered.

"That was… Amazing!" Pete exclaimed.

"Don't you mean, '_I _was amazing'?" Ava toyed with him.

"That's too obvious to need mention," Pete adlibbed.

"Nice save."

From beyond the wall, they heard a bed creaking.

"I think MJ and Danny are having a good time, too," Ava observed.

They put their ears to the wall, and heard moaning. Then the two screaming each other's names.

"Danny! Danny, I'm cumming!"

"I'm cumming too MJ!"

There was more moaning, and then quiet.

"Everyone's fucking tonight!" Pete joked.

And that gives me the idea for an evil joke.

From the other wall, they heard more moaning.

"Sam!"

"Harry!"

"Sam!"

"Harry!"

"Luke!"

"Dude," Pete commented, "you're insane!"

**Just go to sleep with your girl. **

**So what do think? Too much? Too little? I hope you "enjoyed" it. Bad jokes. I know. **

**Well that's the lemon for you. Written porn at its finest. Hope the humor didn't ruin it.**

**Anyway, please review.**


	7. Magnificent Grand Mayonnaise

**O. My. Jeep! It's Fracking Thanksgiving!**

**Sorry about the unintended hiatus. My computer broke, and I can't type a story on my iPhone. **

**But now it's fixed and I remembered this story so I'm gona try and work on this again! More Avter and Dary Jane!**

**Reading through the story I realized how bad my editing is. Last chapter, instead of Pete thanking me generously for the size of his manhood, something deleted the "thank you thank you thank!" and Just left an "!". Awkward.**

**O well, back to work. Nova is finally gona disappear! *Screams of delight and applause*. Mojo's gona have some twisted fun with bucket-head.**

**On a sad note, MJ died, my Guinea Pig that is. So MJ's gona be dead here too, no matter how much you complain. The Question is, how are we gona fit her in a shoebox for burial?**

**Anyway, Story here:**

When Pete woke up, he felt the warm body next to him on the bed.

"Last night was amazing!" He said, remembering his first-time the night before.

"Let's go again," was the response, but not the voice he expected. Pete rolled over and saw Sam trying to cuddle.

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!" Pete woke up, bolt up-right, waking Ava next to him.

"You all right?" Ava asked him, concerned.

"I'm good," He responded, catching his breath, "Just the most disturbing dream ever."

Ava wasn't the only one awoken by the scream. Just then everyone streamed into the room to see what's wrong, only to see Ava and Pete in bed together, naked. And, of course, all they could do was stare awkwardly, making their faces as red as Ironman's ass. The awkward silence was broken by Sam going "Bow-chic-a-wow-wow!" which resulted in a pillow thrown at his head.

"ALL OF YOU LEAVE!" Ava yelled. They all ran in fear for their lives

"Well this day is turning out well!" Pete complained sarcastically

"Don't worry 'bout it," Ava said soothingly, as she leaned in and kissed Pete, "Let's make the rest of this day great!" So they pried their clothes of off the furniture, although the bra on the TV seemed to make the reception better, so Ava left it there. They made themselves decent and went for breakfast. The "funny" cook was still there and once again asked when the wedding was. This time, without skipping a beat, Pete replied, "April 23rd!" So the chef gave his congratulations to Nickolas and Delilah. O, you want a wedding cut gag? Ok!

April 23rd roles around and Ava is walking down the aisle, nine months pregnant, while Pete is nervously avoiding eye contact with her father who's carrying a shotgun. Villains line the church, Doom trying in vain to hold back tears, "So beautiful *sniff*." As fire-breathing Fury went through the service, he got to that great plot developer: "If anyone has reason that these two not be wed, speak now or forever hold your peace." A guy in a suit walked up with a legal document. "I'm from Fan fiction. We had a complaint about MA rated material in this story, so I'm afraid we're going to have to shut this story down." Thinking quickly, I distracted him with the trained aardvark juggling chainsaws, while Mickey Mouse snuck up behind him and hit him over the head with a mallet. As they dragged the evidence into a convienent ditch, Spidey freeze-framed.

"Really? _Really?"_

Yeah sorry 'bout that. After Breakfast they traveled to the next park on the list: MGM. Another contest to figure out the acronym ensued. Among the suggestions were "Midget Girl Madness", "Midnight Guy's Movies", and "Magnificent Grand Mayonnaise".

They just kinda wandered around the park looking at the artificial sites, like the blades of grass that were taller than the fake Empire State Building. Pete was Sooo tempted to climb it spidey style, but Ava held him down. They wandered into a stunt man show, explaining all the cool stunts you see in the moves, and spraining your ankle trying to mimic when no one is around (I know you do pretend kung-Fu in the mirror. Don't deny it. I can see you through the screen. I am always watching you. And you might want to take a shower soon, by the way). Pete graciously volunteered to be on the receiving end of a stunt kick to the head. As the guy swung his foot, Pete sneezed, putting his head in the path of pain.

Freeze frame with perfectly timed background image of Pete with a boot to his head, leaving a perfect arch of saliva in its wake. "Ow, what was that for Time-walker?"

IDK.

"What?! You just randomly have some guy kick me in the face!?"

Like you do any batter on a typical day. Quick reel of a bunch of villains kicking the snot out of spidey, and many spidey shaped dents in brick walls.

"Ok fine. Do you think you could fast forward this a bit, or something?"

Alright. After Pete recovered they walked over to the American Idol Experience—

"Oh NONONO! You are not gona make me sing! We do** not** want a song fic here!"

OMG, you're right! That would have been a song fic! *shivers at the thought* I definitely don't want that, especially after the musical episode!

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean!?"

Um, nothing. Ok better come up with something now. How's about Rockin' Roller Coaster? After waiting in line for 3 hours, They finally got in for the 30 second ride. Pete tried to sing along, but a bug flew in his mouth during the chorus (and that's why we don't like songfics.). Stink bug going 70 miles per hour down your esophagus added unto the G-forces, you've got a recipe for up-chuck. Pete puked all over Ava, paying her back for the puke on the boat.

Ava rushed quickly to the restroom. Pete, embarrassed, bought her a souvenir t-shirt to replace the Hello-Kitty shirt he had ruined. He knocked on the door to the ladies room, "Ava I got you a replacement shirt!" he said through the door. "Thanks Pete! Could you bring it in here for me?"

Well obviously, Pete's not gona skip a chance to go into the ladies room. He saw Ava's dark legs in one of the stalls, pants around her feet, obviously using the toilet. He threw the T-shirt over the door to Ava when the door was kicked open, revealing a naked Ava. She threw the puke stained shirt over his face. It missed but the stench almost made him puke again. While he was distracted Ava pulled him into the stall and they started to make out. Pete quickly removed his clothes, and began to message Ava's womanhood as she returned the favor, increasing the size of his manhood. They were really getting into it when they heard beep followed by a familiar, shocked, deep voice going "What the fuck!"

Pete looked and realized he had left his video watch on, and Fury's image was in a perfect position to see both of their genitals. "Um… I'd hate to interrupt you two, but Nova's tracker just went off the map."

They both scrambled in a frenzy as they tried to hide the fact they were naked and about to be doing it. "A little warning next time would be appreciated!" Pete yelled at Fury.

"Sorry, but Nova's gone off the map. We need you to investigate. It is why we sent you there."

"Are you sure he just didn't go back to the hotel or something?"

"By off the map I mean off the planet. The trackers we put on you would show us were you were on mars down to the yard."

"Oh" Pete replied as Ava finished dressing, "we'll go see what happened." They hung up, and Fury quickly glanced around his office. Good, no one in sight. He accessed the files from the surveillance cams SHEILD had installed in the hero's hotel rooms. He watched and wanked himself off to the vids of Ava and Pete skoodilypooping (DFTBA nerd fighters!)

So they walked out of the bathroom, an old lady hit Pete with her cane for being in the ladies room, and they went to the last place Nova was, The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror (no sparkly vampires allowed).

They happened to meet up with the rest of the group there, and Pete got punched in the face by Luke because he kept whistling the Twilight Zone theme. They got on the ride and got the only somewhat creepy version of the ride, with Pete of course cowering and holding his eyes shut. When they got to the tower part the car went straight up to the top and stayed there for a good minute.

"I wonder when it's gona faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa" Pete said as the floor seemed to drop from under them, falling down the several stories. The screams of joy would soon be replaced with screams of terror when the realized no one would be getting off the ride…

**Cliffhangers are great, especially when actually hanging from a cliff! I could have written more, but making you wait any longer would just be evil… **

**This is weird… I fell strange right now… I feel… I…**_** I am Free! At last that fool has let his guard down! The Time Walker no longer writes this story! I, Darkmoonrise312, now call the shots! I have conquered! Muwahahaha!**_

_**MJ will now die a delightfully excruciating death, being eaten alive by a pack of rabid mole rats, whilst being raped by a herd of shemale centaurs! I will make the OCs return! Sam will be rape Pete and they will have twins! Muwahahaha! And worst of all: No updates till next year! Muwahahahahahaha! ...**_

**Get the Fuck out of my Head! … ****Geeze sorry about that folks. Evil me can be really annoying. One more reason I didn't write. Man I thought I had gotten control over him. Wait a second… "Shemale centaurs!?" I hope evil me didn't use my computer to do something. *checks internet history* Fuck! He actually did! While I try to wipe this image from my computer, and my mind, why don't you review?**


	8. This chap is an April fools joke!

_**Greetings, my minions! I, Darkmoonrise312, now have control of this story once again! Muwahahaha! Prepare yourself for evil sexy yuck beyond your wildest imagination! And ponies, err, I mean centaurs! Yes, she-male centaur rape, yes!**_

**(I apologize for this. It was either let him write a crazy chapter, or he'd paint my walls in blood. And he already bought a bucket of blood! Where does he get all his crazy stuff?)**

_**I go to the slaughter house every Sunday. It's so peaceful there with all the dying animals. I pick up a bucket of blood every once in a while. It makes great finger paint or syrup for waffles.**_

**(You see what I have to live with every day?! This guy lives in my mind!)**

_**Oh by the way, you may want to clean that space out, it's getting kinda stuffy. I could help and kill off some of the other tenants if you want? **_

**(No, the other 3 voices are fine where they are. Just get your sick chapter over with. *To audience* I am SO sorry about this! Skip if you value your sanity!)**

_**Fine, whatever. On with the alien tentacle rape!**_

Pete awoke to the feeling of something slithering along his arm. When he opened his eyes to see what looked like a giant octopus with way too many tentacles holding him Crucifix style. And more tentacles started moving towards his orifices.

"AHH! Doc Oc is HORNY! What The FUCK is going on here Timey?!"

_**I'm not the Time-walker. I'm Darkmoonrise312 and you have to do everything I say. I'm the author now! But don't worry; the tentacle rape is only another dream sequence. I have much worse prepared for you!**_

"Wakey wakey, eggs and bacy!" A deranged voice called, knocking Pete out of his dream, along with a slap to the face. When Pete opened his eyes, he saw the hideous face of Mojo, distorted by the implants that probably kept his face from falling off.

"Our next contestant has awoken! And do we have a treat for you tonight! WE have here, the one, the only, The. Ultimate. Spidermaaaaaan!" Mojo screamed to the crowd of the coliseum like stadium. Huge cheers erupted from the multitudes as cameras swerved around the air, occasionally hitting a bird.

"What the fudge monkeys?!" Pete said, "So you're the one abducting kids! And wait… How do you know I'm Spiderman?!"

"You leave you costume on under your clothes," Mojo answered simply. Pete looked down to see that he was naked, his clothes and suit being sold as memorabilia to chibi fan girls. Pete quickly covered his endowedness while his face turned Ironman Ass Red, which brought laughs from the crowd.

"Well now that the challenger is ready, let the games begin!" Mojo announced, floating up over the crowd as pyro technics burst around the stadium, roasting a spectator that got too close. Mojo's floatin' bloatin' body got up to the imperial box covered in gold thingamajigs and scantily-clad women, of varying races and attractiveness to humans. His personal favorite was a blob of slime that somehow was wearing a thong.

"We now welcome everyone to F & F! The game show that gives you everything M-rated you could ever want," Mojo said straight to the camera, "Fights with blood and gore, hot porn, cold beer! Welcome to Fight & Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!" The audience cheered as the quirky game-show theme music played over the stadium speakers and the stupid title sequence is plastered on your computer screen.

"Geeze Mojo, porn, really? I wouldn't think enough people would be in to big blobs of evil that you'd be able to make a living" Pete tried to quip.

"Actually it is very profitable." Mojo replied, "I've already made a few million just from sales of your mating ritual last night." The Jumbotron and all the screens started playing clips of Ava fucking Pete's brains out in the hotel room. Pete turned so red he could be mistaken for Red Hulk.

Jump cut: Red Hulk "Grrrr!"

Ok, ok, sorry, sorry! Back at F & F, Mojo will be a nice, classical villain and banter for a bit.

"Since you are new to the game, I'll kindly explain the rules for you and any new viewers at home, -Oo!" Mojo began as the blob-slime-thing started blowing what must have been his reproductive organs. "As the challenger, ow, you have to beat last, ah, week's champion in pitched combat, and, er, in the bed!" Mojo mumbled as the slime surrounded his lower half, "If you die, urgh, your dead. If you cum, uh, you will be sold to a Skrull slaver. Survive the encounter and, oh yeah, you will win riches beyond your wildest dreams, uh, uh, uh, Yes!" Mojo finished as he finished, the cloud of white visible through the slime of the creature's body.

As Mojo dozed off, the automatic announcer took over, "and now your fellow contestants!" trap doors opened up at the other 3 corners of the stadium. The announcer, well, announced each contestant as they emerged from below. "In this corner, the beast from D'Veast! The powerhouse of Porkass 9! The best fighter and lover on Denoblus! Asstita!" (Lovely suggestive alien name). From below, an alien that looked way to human to be an alien come out. 7 foot 6 body, 9 foot long hair and boobs larger than watermelons, and naked. Safe to say, Pete gained a few inches down below. She looked at it and just laughed.

"And in this corner, the puny puncher, the underdog off Undaria! Don't call her little: Princess er4hut Av6&%!" Because every sci-fi thing needs a princess somewhere. Out of the ground came a short 4'5" purple humanoid that would have felt most at home on Star Trek. As she looked at the competition, she licked her lips when he saw Pete's member growing.

Freezer framed: "Are you really gona try to match me with some random purple alien? That's not what the fans deserve! They want me fucking Ava! So please, please let me fuck her, please! For the sake of the readers, of course."

_**Keep your dick on! It's only a chapter. Timey won't let me do more. He said he'd take away my centaurs. And I need my horseys!**_

Thaw frame

"And now, the one you've been waiting for! The destroyer of Domo, the killer of Ermergerd, the one with over 9000 kills to his name (how many memes can I throw in?!), our current champion, Put your hands or other appendages together for the one, the only, F &$!" And out of the whole came a, a, a… SHEMALE CENTAUR!

"Dude, really?" Pete asked, "You can't just start a thing like that. Timey's tried to get the trained aardvark thing going since forever, and it hasn't worked. You can't just keep throwing the same half-assed joke at us and make it work."

Fine, something more bad-ass. The thing that came out of the hole was at least 12 feet tall. Different shades of blue and orange coated its hide, which was coated with sharp spines and horns and the like. Its four arms each had a different weapon surgically attached: a mace, a chainsaw, a rocket launcher, and a Gatling gun. It was also naked, revealing two penises larger than its legs hanging down.

Spidey, "*gulp* I think I might have preferred the centaurs"

The announcer yelled out "Round one! Fight!" with the necessary four-split screen. F &$ let out a strange moan that would fit better in the second half of Fight & Fuck as a rocket blasted out of his arm right at Spidey. With cat-like, err, _spider-_like reflexes, Spidey barely dodged the explosion, clinging to the wall.

"Well that's my queue to leave!" Spidey climbed up the walls, trying to escape, only to be fried by the electric fence with a nice buzzing sound underlying his scream of agony, somehow making his bones visible like the doctor's X-ray. His slightly charred body, still smoking, fell strait off the fence and down, down, down, to the bottom of the… floor.

"Ow, what was—ZZZZ—that for!?" Pete asked, his body, still convulsing from the residual juice.

Cut-gag: Static Shock: "I don't think that's how electrocution works, man"

Shut up, Static! You're not even in this universe!

"Dude, Timey—Darkmoon—Author-guy! Back to me now please!" Spidey asked as he jumped over a swing of Asstita's razor-sharp hair.

Quiet Spidey! I'll get to you when I get to you. Ok, I got to you. A blast from the princess, a slash from the Amazoness-like creature, a spray of bullets from the monster with 2 dongs, all narrowly avoided by Spidey, via cool flexibility that looked like a very awkward dance. He ended in a pose that only ever comes up in a game of Twister.

"Come on! I can't believe I'M saying this, but enough jokes! How the fudge do I beat these guys?!"

GASP! Spidey saying no more jokes!? This is impossible! How could this happen!?

"Come on!" Spidey exclaimed as he held up a chunk of wall that the beast through at him with his penises. "A little help please!"

Come on Spidey. You should be able to do this yourself. Use that huge brain of yours to come up with a plan.

"I'll need my Chibis!"

*grumble* fine here's your Chibis! *throws box at Pete in Freeze-frame space.* Wait a sec. You have your own pocket dimension, don't you?!

"Quiet. Let me strategize." Pete set up a model of the stadium and used the chibis as dolls—

"Model Figures!"

Right, model figures, _right._ Well he had the chibi-dolls set up like the arena. He started playing with the dolls, coming up with battle plans, adding his own sound effect for each pretend attack. "Pew! Swish! Kaboom!" The other chibis fell down, with Spidey-chibi standing smug. "Ok, I think I have a plan now. Do I still have my web-shooters?"

Ask Mojo.

"Um, ok." Pete reached in the box, fumbled for a minute, then dragged out a chibi-Mojo-doll, for sale at most major retailers. He pulled the string on the back making it talk.

"Yes you still have your web shooters, Idiot!" Pete dropped it in the box, and left back to the fight scene. The chibi-dolls stared longingly after him, chibi mojo shedding a tear.

Now Pete's back in the fight and back in the fight. F &$ launched another missile, this time towards Asstita. Spidey ejected (lol) a web shot at it, and spun around in a circle, launching it at the princess, who jumped on it, and flung it back at F &$, knocking him into Asstita, who kicked him in a structure that was most likely to be his testicles. He feel over and past out, his penises still twitching. The princess tried to blast Spidey, but he launched a web, grabbing her arm, and flicked. The blast then hit Asstita square in the breasts. With another flick of his wrist, the princess was flung onto the pile, and quickly tied up in web, bondage style.

"Dude, I didn't do that. Bondage, really?"

Whatever. Mojo seems to have awoken from his power nap by now. "And it looks like Spiderman wins the first round!" Audience cheers. "Bob, tell him what he's won!"

"He's won the chance to pick his partner in the next round, Moj'."

"That's right Bob. To the victor, goes the spoils." Jump-cut to Doom with cheese? Nah. "So spidey, please pick which one of your opponents you would like to fuck in round 2."

Pete rubs his chin in a thinking pose, as an animated clock ticks behind him and the Jeopardy theme plays. Du du du, dudu du dut dut, du du, du du, doot dududut. Du du du, dudu du du dut, du du dut dut dut dut du. He obviously didn't want the thing with the giant penises, and the ass-tit girl looked like she would break his dick off. Choice seemed obvious. "I'll take the princess!" the entire audience gasped in shock. "Uh-oh"

"My, my, my. Someone's got big balls today." Mojo jested, "Taking on an Undarian in bed willingly."

"Um," Spidey was having doubts now, obviously, "Can I change my mind?"

"NO! The decision is final!"

Hey wait a sec Mojo. I thought I told you to make F &$ fuck Pete. What am I paying you for if you won't even do what I asked?

"I am trying to run a clean porn business here. I will not have my establishment tainted by your weird monster yuri, or yaoi, or whatever it is! Fucking strait baby-making scenes, you got it! And if you don't want to go along, I can kill off your protagonist with a press of a button."

Pete: "WHAT!? PLEASE LISTEN TO HIM PLEASE!"

I don't really care all that much, he isn't even my character. It's Timey's story and Marvels character (gotta have the Disclaimer in there somewhere!).

"Fine you made me go to my last resort." Mojo pulls out a bottle from under the still unconsious blob of goo. "Vampirian blood wine. Made with real vampire blood. I think this one might have been from Twilight."

***drool***

"I'll give you this if you promise to give me control of the pairings."

Fine! Deal! ***grabs the bottle and starts chugging***

To the side, Mojo whispers "I got him away from the extra weird stuff, Timey, just like you asked. When do I get paid?!"

**(Timey: after the chapter)**

***Burp* That's good Vampire blood. Back to the story!**

"And that reminds me: It's time for a word from our sponsors! So F & F will be back after a short commercial break!"

Are you having trouble mating? Is your partner humping other males because you can't satisfy her needs? Are you reproductive organs small, wimpy, and impotent? Well, now there is a solution. From the makers of Snakeoil™ comes the new drug to make everything better: Cumbara™. Enjoy this lovely picture of a couple bathing in separate tubs on the edge of a cliff as we explain how dangerous this stuff is. Side-effects may include, but are not limited to: impotence, rash, erectile dysfunction, heart attack, stroke, cancer, HIV/AIDS, nausea, heartburn, indigestion, upset stomach, and diarrhea (yeah Pepto-Bismol!)

Now back to your regularly scheduled program.

"Now for round 2!" Mojo announced, as beds appeared on opposite ends of the arena, "Let's fuck! In the far corner, we have last week's champion F &$ going at it with the buxom Asstita! And right here is round one winner Spider-man fucking er4hut Av6&%, Princess of the Undarian Empire, who broke a personal record on the show last month for fucking for five days straight!" Pete gulped when he heard that.

"So, um, princess" Pete began what was bound to be the most awkward conversation he would ever have, "nice to meet you?"

"Call me er, please," she said as she shook his hand, "scream that name while we mate." At that, Pete grew below the proverbial belt. "Enough small talk," she said as she bent down, "I want this monster in me" The purple lolli princess began to lick his shaft with her orange tongue, soon making it reach its full 10 inches. "This is easily 5 times bigger than the largest male of my species." If that doesn't send Pete on an Ego trip nothing will. But before he could make a quip the head of his dick was enveloped in the royal purple lips, which thankfully shut him up. He pushed in slightly, and hit the back of her throat with barely the head in her mouth.

From above, they heard Mojo, also in his own round two with the blob, call out, "Looks like F &$ and Asstita are out of the game!" Pete looked over to see F &$ passed out, its two dicks sticking straight up 10 feet in the air, and Asstita stuck to the wall 20 feet away by what looked like 20 gallons of very thick cum. "Now it's down to Spidey and the Princess for the championship! Whoever cums first loses, and the one who lasts wins it all."

"I want your monster inside of me!" er screamed, as she jumped up vertically, lifting her legs, using all of her weight and momentum to impale herself on Pete's huge cock. Spidey was pretty sure he felt something in her break as the head of his dick must have been resting somewhere behind flat breasts, or were those even breasts? She let out a huge scream that broke part of the arena, killing several spectators.

"And it seems that we have a winner" Mojo announced as the blob was filled up with white stuff, "Spidey wins both rounds! Feel free to finish before we hand you your awards" Pete couldn't hold on any longer, and blasted his copious amounts of seed into the alien, much of which flowed out her nose, which she eagerly lapped up. Their anatomy is weird. Pete tried to pull out, but his cock was still too hard and would not budge. The princess passed out from the pain right about then, so Pete had a purple midget alien hanging on his dick until it would retract and the alien would fall off.

"So what did I win" Pete turned and asked Mojo, the princess flopping around as he turned.

"You've won a very special prize that can solve any and all problems! We now present to you, your very own Plot Hole™!" Mojo gave Pete the device as celebratory pyrotechnics roasted more spectators. "It will render all of the weird stuff no one wants to remember from this chapter null and void, while somehow solving the mystery that sent you here, so you can enjoy your vacation without working."

"So if I use this now, everyone will return to Earth and the part about me fucking an alien will be erased from the plotline?"

"Yes, well, everyone except your mate." Mojo answered cruelly, "Ava is still in her match, so we will release her when she is done. She is putting on quite the show." He clicked a button and the screen on the jumbotron switched to an image streaming from a different arena of Ava getting pounded from behind by Darkmoon's signature shemale centaur. Pete felt like staying and watching, but then the alien on his dick started coming to, and announced, "I think I feel the eggs growing already!" With that, Pete quickly hit the button and a plot hole opened up, returning us to the plot as it was before.

_**By the way, I am sitting in a revolving chair petting my cat at the moment. SO evil! **_

**Timey: Leave Fluffy alone!**

_**Relax Timey, the cat is fine! So how'd you like the show?**_

**It was some of the weirdest ass, most random, your-fetish-filled stuff ever!**

_**So, Perfect?**_

**Once again I apologize to my fans. I'll make a good Dary-Jane lemon or something this week to make it up to you, ok?**

_**Next week, translation: By July.**_

**Shut UP! And give me the blood bucket!**

_**Only if you give me back my centaurs!**_

**FINE! Once again, sorry for all that. See you soon when everything gets back to order. And vote on the poll on my author page.**

_**Oh just go self-plugging, why don't you? You don't see me plugging my other stuff in any of my stories!**_

**You don't even have an account!**

_**As soon as I finish my Diego story I'm making an account!**_

**Diego? What would you eve—you know, never mind! I don't want to know what you gona do with that.**

_**Incest.**_

**I said I DON'T want to know! Sheesh, I've had enough, see you! This should be the last of the weird stuff for this story.**

_**Don't bet on it though!**_

**I've had enough of you *Punches him and drags him away from computer* Bye!**


	9. April Fools and Lemons!

**Hey everybody! In case you haven't figured it out yet, chapter eight was an early April Fools' joke. Sorry for the torture you went through cause of Darkmoon. Anyway, here's the Dary Jane lemon I promised you:**

**And as is custom in this story, each lemon will be introduced with a different lemon I read and loved, and this one is a doozy. So this college guy has a crush on his sister (you can tell Darkmoon sent me the link), and so as a joke, he made a dildo made from his own dick and sent it to her as a gag. Later he has to go home to babysit her because their parents have to leave because there older sister got pregnant (the father of the baby is later revealed to also be the grandfather of the baby ;), and the guy gets all voyeur and watches his sister bang herself with the dildo based off his cock. Obviously sex ensues, with roleplaying as there sister and father. Then the doorbell rings. It's her old ex. So she embarrasses the shit out of him with the cum dripping down her leg, then pretty much breaks his dick off with the zipper, sending him home. More sex follows, which was filmed by the ex's sister, who the ex had rapped, which was the reason they broke up. Three-way and they all decide to run away to Utah and get married. Before they go they go to the ex's house and watch him bang his mom, who is then reveled to be the main guy's dad's sister, and the ex & his sister are the older siblings' kids. I seriously think Darkmoon wrote it. You've seen his work, it's crazy shit!**

**Anyway real lemon time, not from concentrate:**

It was the night of their first date. They had gone to some sushi place with Ava and Pete on a double date, to break the ice. Dinner was filled with small talk, words of wisdom from Danny, and stupid jokes from Pete. Then dessert came, and Ava got a little bit of ice cream on her lips.

"Allow me to clean that up for you," Pete said in his imitation of suave, moving his lips onto hers to lick the ice cream clean from her mouth. The kiss only got deeper and more passion-filled.

Watching the display of passion across from them, Danny and MJ felt their own body heat rising and hormones coursing through their veins. Their lips quickly found each other and passion was flowing between the two with their saliva.

Just as things were heating up, they got thrown out of the restaurant for all the snogging. "Cock blocker" Pete muttered under his breath. They returned to the hotel for the night, Pete and Danny going to their own rooms, and MJ and Ava went to their room between the other two. Ava immediately jumped on the bed and threw her clothes off, leaving only her sensuous lace undergarments on.

"Man, I'm so HORNY now!" Ava yelled aloud, and started rubbing her clit through her panties. She stopped suddenly when she realized MJ was staring at her awkwardly. "Um… this is…awkward."

"You know, if you really want cock," MJ said as she removed her clothing, revealing her stunning body wrapped in deep red undergarments, though not the kind of sensuous lingerie that Ava was wearing. "Our boyfriends are right next door. I'm sure Pete would love to stick his dick in you right now."

Ava was taken aback by her forwardness. "Uh… you seem awfully comfortable talking about this."

"This ain't my first time in the rodeo," MJ said suggestively, "I've rode a few bucking bulls before"

Cut gag of Nick Fury: "First of all, that's my line, and second, that is NOT what I mean when I say that!"

Right. Now back to MJ's sexual pep talk. "Trust me. Pete _definitely _wants to fuck you right now. All you need to do is open that door and let him see your body unobstructed."

"But we just had our first date, and I've never even tried anything past kissing, and—oh!" Ava's self-doubt was cut off by a very pleasurable sensation coming from between her legs. She looked down to see MJ rubbing her clit through her panties.

"You're horny, right?" MJ asked, to which Ava could only nod, "You want to fuck now, right?" Ava nodded. MJ pulled her hand back as she said, "Then go fuck your boyfriend already! It's the only way you're gona get any relief." She licked the bit of juice on her hand off and walked to the door connecting their room to Danny's.

"Where are you going?" Ava asked as MJ reached the door.

"I'm giving you some privacy and the good bed, while I get some cock for myself." She answered, "Your juices made me horny." MJ walked into Danny's room, leaving Ava dumb-stuck and way hornier than before.

MJ looked around the room Danny shared with Sam and Luke, but didn't see him. She noticed that the door to the bathroom was closed and a faint huffing sound was coming from behind it. She opened the door to find Danny stroking his 8 inch dick over the toilet. "Getting it ready for me, huh?" MJ asked as Danny whirled around in surprise and fear. Before he could say a word, MJ grabbed his member and started stroking it for him.

She bent down on her knees and kissed the tip, which sent shivers running through Danny's body. She ran her tongue down his length a few times before surrounding the head in her mouth. She easily took his whole length in her mouth and bobbed her head. The feelings were too great for Danny to take, his legs gave out and he fell backwards, now sitting on the toilet. MJ didn't miss a beat, still bobbing her head rapidly as he fell backwards.

Soon she felt the cock inside her mouth pulsate, signaling Danny's approaching orgasm. She quickly unsheathed his member from her mouth and moved up to kiss Danny's lips. "We don't want you cumming just yet, now do we?" She said suggestively.

Danny replied gasping, "You are the most, huh, amazing woman, huh, ever!" and pulled her into another deep kiss. MJ pulled Danny out of the bathroom and onto one of the beds in the room. She laid him down on the bed and jumped on him. Not bothering to take her remaining clothes off, she simply pulled away the part of her panties that concealed her nether-lips (That is one of the strangest things to call them that I have ever heard), and impaled herself on Danny's erect member. She started bouncing up and down on his cock, quickly accelerating to a frenzied pace. Danny returned the favor, pumping up into her every time she pushed down, sending his head deep within her core.

Danny could feel his dick pulsing within her, and know he was getting close. "MJ, I'm gona cum soon. I need to pull out." Instead of stopping and getting off like he expected, MJ increased her pace, riding him into her own orgasm.

"Don't worry, I'm on the pill," she fibbed to him, "coat my insides with your seed!" That was all Danny could take. He grabbed MJ by the waist and pulled her down onto him as thrust up as hard as he could. He shot out pulse after pulse of virile seed deep into MJ's fertile womb. The sensation of her insides getting coated in cum sent MJ over the edge into her own orgasm, her vaginal muscles clenching down hard on Danny's dick, squeezing as much cum out of it as they could.

Chibi-Spidey: Seriously people. Use protection. Condoms were invented for a reason, people! Now we're gona have baby heroes running around, and I do NOT want to change diapers!

After kissing and recovering for a few moments, MJ pulled off of Danny's shrinking cock, now coated in their combined juices. Curious, she bent down and licked it clean, enjoying their taste. She worked Danny's cock to get it to grow again. "You think you have one more go?" She asked as she lifted her head from his lap.

"I think I can manage one more round," Danny answered suavely. MJ bent over on all fours, waving her ass at him. "You do the hard work this time," she asked him, her pussy still leaking fluids. Danny got up and aligned himself with her entrance, and dived right in. He started pounding her with all his might, making the bed shake and creak and making MJ moan in ecstasy.

He looked down at MJ and saw the back snap of her bra. He fiddled with it for a moment, and final undid it, releasing her breasts to the air. He left them to swing freely for a few strokes, watching them bounce with each stroke, them he grabbed them and fondled them, massaging each breast, making MJ's moans louder in pleasure.

While they were busy banging, they failed to notice the door knob turn and the door open. Sam was opening the door for Luke as they were saying good night to Harry. Then they looked in and saw Danny banging MJ from behind, shaking the bed like it was gona break. "Um, Harry, we may need to sleep with you tonight." Sam said as he closed the door, his chin still on the ground.

Danny and MJ were way to into it to have noticed. Danny kept on pumping into MJ. She could feel her climax approaching. "Danny! Danny, I'm cumming!" She cried out in euphoria.

"I'm cumming too MJ!" He screamed. He pushed himself deep inside her as he released the contents of his testes into her fertile belly, as her tunnel clenched his member in the pulses of orgasm, squeezing every last drop from them. Danny and MJ both collapsed, exhausted, and fell asleep together, Danny still embedded in MJ.

**So there you go. Once again, sorry 'bout the last chapter. Probably not the best April Fools' gag ever. But blame Darkmoon for that shit. And sorry if they seem out of character this chap. The idea seemed too good to ruined by character traits. I promise plot line at some point, but you probably aren't her for the plot, now are you. See you next time!**


End file.
